Ianao Namako (You Are My Friend)
by YayaSamuko
Summary: "Miss Yazawa, we're sorry to tell you, but unfortunately, the operation failed… You have about three months left…" These words were bitter. 18 years living in this world, taking care of my younger siblings and dreaming about idol, I just started college and yet. Why is my destiny so cruel? (DROPPED/DISCONTINUED)
1. Chapter 1: Most Valuable Treasure

**Ianao Namako (You Are My Friend)**

 **Genre:** **Tragedy, Family, Hurt/Comfort, Drama**

 **Rating:** **T**

 **Chapter 1:** **Most valuable treasure**

 _Hello there! This time I came with a somewhat sequel to "Eto Aho", though, the stories are independent…_

 _Note 1: This story happens about one year after Honoka's death (Funeral) and Nico is the main character…_

 _Note 2: Like in its prequel, I will put the appropriate song in (…). Not that it's not obligatory to listen to them, but giving them a try will help boosting the emotion…_

 _Synopsys: "Miss Yazawa, we're sorry to tell you, but unfortunately, the operation failed… You have about three months left…" These words were bitter. 18 years living in this world, taking care of my younger siblings and dreaming about idol, I just started college and yet. Why is my destiny so cruel?_

 _Warning: Dying heroine/protagonist, Yuri and lot of tragedy ahead; so, please ready yourself before processing into the story…_

 _So, sit back, relax and prepare some handkerchief/tissues before enjoying the story…_

 _(Song: Himeko's Theme)_

My name is Yazawa Nico. I used to be an idol during my high school life. Now, I am studying art at University.

I have three younger siblings. My father passed away long ago. Due to that, Mother is always working and I have to take care of my sisters and brother.

"Nicocchi…" Someone's voice was calling for me.

"What is it Nozomi?" We were sitting on a bench at the University's campus. Nozomi, Eli and I went to the same College, but took different course. It was still in the summer. It was hot, so we sat on a shadowy spot.

"You've been pacing out lately. Are you sure you are all right?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" She annoyed me most of the time, but yet… She and Eli are my best friends. In our high school, I had many other friends: Hanayo, Kotori, Umi, Maki, Honoka and Rin…

Honoka and Rin… The thought of these two brought sadness into my throat. It all happened about a year… Honoka got hospitalized… Rin got into a car accident… They both paced away…

We were best buds. It's right that sometimes they were annoying. They were so dumb, but they were my friends. People even called us the "Smile trio"… And others preferred "Idiot trio"…

"Nicocchi…" Suddenly, a hand waved in front of my face. "You see. You were somewhere else again."

"I wasn't!" I yelled, trying to hide my sadness. She didn't believe me. She just made a puzzled face. "Liar!"

"It's none of your business anyway." I finished my lunch and stood up. "Let's go! Class is about to start." I started walking away.

"Wait up, Nicocchi…" She panicked and quickly followed me.

 _(Song: Lamune 79s)_

"I'm home." I announced as I enter the place we called "home". It was filled with silence. I turned the light on. It was already 18:30. Class ended later today.

I walked toward the kitchen and started cooking. At that time, my siblings walked in to greet me. "Welcome home, big sis."

"I'm back." I gently smile at them. "So, how was school today?"

"Sis, look at this." Cocoa handed over a paper. She got a perfect score in Math. I pated her head. "That's amazing."

With that, the three of the walked away. Their evening cartoon was about to start and they didn't want to miss it. I returned into my chores. I decided to go with some novelettes for diner.

Half an hour later, I served diner to my siblings. Mother wasn't still back from home. She was working really hard for us. I idolize her. She is such a strong woman.

 _(Song: Narcissus instrumental version)_

We were done eating after half an hour. Mother wasn't still back. I took the covers and started washing the assets.

It was common for me to do chores. Since Mother is always working, I have to take care of my siblings. I love my family, so I always want to do my best for them.

"I'm home." I heard the door open. Second after, my siblings ran to the entrance. "Welcome home."

I peeked from the kitchen corner. I smiled at that beautiful scenery: A Mother was greeted by her loving children after a hard day at work.

I returned into my chores after a moment. The other family members went to the living room. _I guess that Mother will need to change first._ With that, I took an asset and put them on the table. I took the omelets I prepared for her and put them next to the asset.

"Ah, good evening, Nico." I turned and was greeted by Mother's usual gentle smile. She has already changed. I smile at her. "Diner is ready."

"Thank you." With that, I excused myself and went into my room.

 _(Song: Hikari Furu Nara)_

"Hein? What is this feeling?" I brutally awoke. It was still dark outside. I fell something hurting on my chest. The pain amplified at each respiration I took. "What is happening?" My inspirations were heavy. My voice wouldn't come out.

"Mother… Mother…" My voice was reduced into whisper. The pain became unbearable. I couldn't understand what is happening. All I knew was that I could hear someone running on the couloirs.

"Nico! What's wrong?" Mother opened the room of my door with a panic tone. She ran to the bed where I was laying.

"My chest… It hurt." My voice was so low that she needed to lean closer to hear me. "Hang in there! I am going to call an ambulance." She ran out of the room.

I placed both hands on my chest as the pain was more intense now. "Aw…" I couldn't hold my screaming pain now.

"Mama, what's wrong?" I heard Cocoa's voice from the other room.

"Mama is taking Nico to the hospital, so please stay with your brother and sister, OK."

"But what's wrong with big sis?" Cotaro's voice echoed.

My vision started to blur as I fell my respiration became heavy. My hand fell. My eyes started to close… Minute after, all I could see was darkness."

 _(Song: Roaring Elevated Railways 2007)_

I opened my eyes. The first thing I saw was white ceiling. "This isn't my room… What happened?" My voice was husky and low.

As I was trying to remember what happened, the pain on my chest came back, but less heavy this time. I held on the hurting place and tried to stand up,, but failed.

"As I can see, you're awake." I heard an unfamiliar voice. I lifted my head to see a beautiful red-haired woman. I had the impression that I've already see her somewhere.

"This is… Where?" I had a hard time trying to speak.

"This is the hospital. I am the doctor Nishikino." _Nishikino… Nishikino… Where did I already hear that name before?_ My thoughts were ditzy. I fell like I knew that person, but couldn't remember.

"You are Yazawa Nico, right? My daughter always talked to me about you." _That's it! I remember now._ I woke up last night with a huge pain on my chest and my mother called an ambulance. That doctor here must be Maki's mother.

"Mother…? How about my Mother…?" I coughed as my chest was tightening.

"There, there…" She gently patted my back. "You shouldn't talk yet." She sighed. "She just went to work. You should just rest for now. Your operation is in 4 hours, so you'll need all your strength."

"What operation?" I looked at her with a surprised look.

"Don't talk." She started with a severe look. I looked down and played with my hand in defeat. "You almost got an heart attack…" Her voice softened, "…But your Mother managed to bring you here quickly. Though, you will need to be operated later."

 _(Song: Narcissus Opening (by Riya))_

I lifted my head. I wanted to ask her something, but I was scared that she scowled me again. The doctor saw the fear in my eyes and handed over a note and a pet. "Here… Write your question here."

I accepted her offer and started writing my question. My writing was bad. I didn't know why but my hand was shaking. After a minute, I turned the note to her.

"What is that operation you are talking about?"

"Well… Your heart was wounded. I don't know if you were already awarded but you heart was weaker that the normal since your childhood. According to your data, you had some minor cardiac problems when you were little…" The doctor explained.

I turned the note again and started writing on it.

"What will happen if the operation failed?"

She looked down, trying to avoid looking at me. "I prefer not talking about it. You have to rest for now."

She was about to leave when I called for her. "Wait!" I coughed aster doing so. She turned back. I quickly took the note and decided to write another question.

"What about my siblings?"

"Don't worry. My daughter is with them. You can relax for now." She finally walked out of the room.

 _(Song: Emerald Sea version 2)_

I sighed. I was now alone in the room. Since it was an individual room, it was quiet… too quiet.

It was Saturday. My siblings weren't supposed to go to school. The doctor said that Maki is with them, so I can rest assured.

It was 09:00. My operation is in one hour. I fell anxious. _What if the operation failed?_ That question ran on my head as I was looking at the window.

I was sitting on the bed; my eyes were glued to the window. I saw blue sky. It was warm. The gentle wind bruised into the room. My hair was untied. It was pretty long and the wind bruised them.

I turned around and saw that already half an hour has already passed. _The time is running today._

"Miss Yazawa…" A nurse has entered the room. I turned to her. She was pushing a wheeled chair. "I will help you."

She walked near the bed and gently moved me to the chair. My body fell so heavy. I had difficulty moving… And by doing such movement, my breathing became heavy once more.

The nurse pushed the chair out of the room. I then realized that I was in a white pajama and a neon green wristband was en my hand. "This…?" I pointed at that weird bracelet. The nurse looked at it. "It's an identification." That was all she could explain. _I guess it's all the explanation I need._

After about five minutes, we arrived in the front of the operatory block.

"Are you ready?" The helper asked. I nodded as response and we entered the new room.

 _(Song: Koko ni Iru (by KAKO))_

I sighed for the 20th time today. It was 15:00 and no one has entered the room since the operation has ended. _I wonder what they are doing…_ I thought about my siblings.

I could now walk. I made my go and come all around the room since they told me to stay there. I leaned against the window and looked at the scenery. I was at the 4th floor of the Nishikino's hospital.

There was a park at the nearby. Children were playing and Teenagers were walking or resting. My month opened as I saw Maki sitting on one of the bench. She was holding a conned ice. In front of her, I saw my three siblings playing. I smiled.

Suddenly, Maki turned into my direction. Her amethyst eyes met my rubies'. Her way of looking has changed. There was sadness in her eyes. Honoka's death must have hit her hard. She was still wearing black outfit. Kotori and she have difficulty moving on.

Maki gestured to m siblings and they turned to my direction. They were so far seen from this window where I was watching. They waved at me. I waved back at them. Then, they returned to their plays.

 _(Song: South Facing Window)_

"Miss Yazawa…" The same Nurse from early re-entered the room. "Please follow me."

I walked away from the window and followed her. I stood quiet. We walked toward the doctor's office.

"Come in." Doctor Nishikino said. I took the sat in front of her as the Nurse walked away.

The atmosphere fell awkward. "So…" I started.

"I will not turn around the pot…" She bit her bottom lips. "It's really sad, but…"

I already knew what she was about to say. Tears were already forming on my eyes. "Miss Yazawa, we're sorry to tell you, but unfortunately, the operation failed… You have about three months left…" These words were bitter. _18 years living in this world, taking care of my younger siblings and dreaming about idol, I just started college and yet. Why is my destiny so cruel?_

My cheeks watered. I was sad for my Mother… _What will happen to her…? What about my siblings…?_ Were all I cared about.

The doctor stood quiet. I realized that her eyes have watered too. "We're really sorry. We did our best though…"

She was sobbing. "Maki just lost a friend not long ago… And now… How could I stand seeing her crying again?"

 _What could I do? Why is all of this happening to us? What kind of sin did we do to be punished as such?_

 _(Song: Scarlet)_

"Nico… Sorry, I'm late. I had to work overtime today." My Mother alongside my siblings entered the room. It was 19:45 and I was resting on the bed. I gave a weak smile. "I'm glad to see you here." I replied.

"That reminds me… I brought these." She took a strawberry pie from her hand bag. "These are your favorite, right?"

The five of us gathered near the bed. Mother cut the pie in 5. We both took one. I took one bit.

"By the way," Mother started, I lifted my head to see her usual smile. I loved that smile. I would do anything to protect it. "Your friend's Mother is really kind. She made your treatment free and she even allowed Cocoa, Cocoro and Cotaro here. We'll have to properly thank her." The four of them smiled at me.

I looked down as tears fell from my eyes. I couldn't look at them.

"What's wrong?" She asked. _How could I say it to her?_ I was so scared. I didn't want to inflict them such a hard time. _What should I do?_

"Mother…" I decided to be strong. Sooner or later, they will be acknowledged of it. I whipped my tears away. "…The operation… Failed…" My heart broke as Mother's smile switched into a sad expression.

She took my siblings out for an instant and walked back in. She ran to my side. My chest tightened as I saw her tears. I couldn't hold it anymore. I threw myself at her. "Mother, I am sorry…"

"There… There…" She sobbed, patting my eyes, trying to comfort me and herself.

 _What are we going to do now?_ My thoughts were on my family. I cried on Mother's embrace. I couldn't think of anything anymore. All I just wanted was to be with my family.

 **[To be continued]**

 _I don't know when I will post the next chapter. I will depend on three facts: my schedule, my mood and my family. All I know is that I will give my best in this story._

 _I'm so glad the story Eto Aho had so many success. It focused on the romance side and this one will be more family-issued._

 _So, any Reviews are appreciated. It would help us a lot if we know the public's opinion about this._


	2. Chapter 2: My Special Someone

**Ianao Namako (You Are My Friend)**

 **Genre: Tragedy, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Friendship**

 **Rating: T**

 **Chapter 2: My special someone**

 **Here is the second chapter. Hope you enjoy it. And yes, this is a NozoNico story. Just read and find out.**

 **By the way, sorry for the late update!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any character or show mentioned here.**

[-x-x-x-]

 _I am at loss… I don't know what to do anymore…_

 _My family… my friends… I don't want to lose them… they are so important for me…_

 _My dream…_

I slowly opened my eyes and was greeted by high white ceiling. I took a glance around to see unfamiliar beds, unfamiliar window in an unfamiliar room.

I sighed. _'So… it wasn't a nightmare… It is real…'_

I pushed my back so I was in a sitting position, but did it slowly as my chest still pained me like hell. I just took another glance around and then at myself.

Here I was, sitting on this white hospital metallic bed at one of the Nishikino's hospital. The room I was in was a one-patient room and I was alone right at that time. Normally, this kind of room shall be expensive and hard to afford, but since Maki's mother insisted, we got this room for free.

Well… our family didn't have to pay anything since I was there in the first place. They took care of me as one of their daughter's close friend. I didn't like that idea, but I am somehow glad to know about that.

As for myself… I was still wearing a pink cotton pajama they gave to the patient. To the top of that, they gave me a white plastic wristband with my name, my blood type and the address of that hospital. They instructed me to wear that bracelet anytime from that time on and to never remove it by any pretext.

I sighed after taking a small glance at the small plastic accessory.

" _White means that you should be a resident of the hospice… but since you decided to go home instead, you will have to bring that accessory wherever you go and you have to find an helper to have an eye on you."_ That was what the head doctor told me.

After letting go another sigh, I moved by the side and was sitting on the edge of the bed. That was when the door opened as the person I was waiting entered.

"Good morning, Mother!" I tried to smile.

I vowed the night before to not cry anymore in front of them. I vowed to always smile until the last time. I wanted to be the loveable and full-of-dream Nico they always knew and loved.

"Good morning!" she greeted back and sat beside me. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yes, Mother!" I pointed at a small bag at the corner of the room. My clothes from when I was sent here were carefully tidied inside that small bag.

Mother grabbed the bag with one hand and held my hand with the other. We slowly walked out of the room.

I was able to walk for now, but my legs are still weak and it may only get worse by each passing day. I will sometimes eventually return inside a wheeling chair in some weeks… that was what the doctors predicted.

Mother still held my hand as the two of us walked the crowded hallways. It was the morning and doctors like visitors or patients were walking all around the place.

My small figure wasn't in help at that time. I was petite and short and people occasionally jostled accidentally into me. I just gripped at the hand tighter. Mother understood and leaned closer to me as a motion of shield.

I was pathetic!

Another five minutes and we were finally at the main counter. I sat on a small chair made for waiting purpose while Mother was filling some papers at the nurse's office. I took one magazine from the small table and started killing time with it.

I have already finished 4 magazines until the woman I was waiting finally came back.

"Sorry for the wait!"

I didn't reply with word; that was useless. I just smiled and held her hand before standing up and the two of us excited the boring and crowded building.

We took a taxi and were at the apartment in half an hour. The rooms were empty as I first took a glance. I then sighed and took a seat at the crouch.

Mother then went into her room and walked out minute later, wearing her work outfit. "I have to go to work, but I will try to get home early. You do not have to worry about Cocoro, Cocoa and Cotaro. I will pick them up after work and for diner…"

"I can take care of it!" I said, interrupting her. She made a concerned face. I just smiled to reassure her. "It will be fine! I can still prepare diner."

Mother hesitated a little as she opened her mouth, but said nothing, and then closed in back. Her lips formed a small gentle and comforting smile. "All right, then… You can call a friend if you feel lonely. All your things are tidied in your room and your collection of idol's DVD are inside your desk. All ingredients are in the fridge and feel free to prepare whatever you want."

I gave her another smile and she finally walked out of the apartment.

I let go of a sigh as Mother was out of sigh. I was bored! It was only the first day and I was bored. _'I suppose I can't do idol stuffs anymore… I can't dance because of my weak body and I can't sing because of my husky voice added by my throat and chest that are paining me each time I speak…'_

I stared blankly at the ceiling, and then at the clock. I let go of another sigh. I didn't even remember how many time I sighed that day.

"I miss them…" I was feeling really weird at that time. It was as if my mind and soul were sad and wanted all my hidden feeling to be exposed. I closed my eyes.

I realized that I became a lot more honest since that day I learned that I was going to die soon. Okay, I could still hide some truth, but I don't know how many times I could keep that façade.

"I wonder what she is doing…?" by she, I meant a certain purple-haired girl. A girl that was one of my former co-idols back in µ's. She had the bad tendency of groping every cute girl she knew.

With another sigh, her image flashed in my mind. I saw her voluptuous cleavage that was laughing at my face. I saw her emerald eyes glaring right into me and piercing my soul. I saw her way of clothing… it was kind of cute, I have to admit. And I saw her smile… that usually warm and welcoming smile she always had when the two of us were alone.

"Nicocchi…" that voice I came to enjoy these past months. It is hard to admit, but I became attached a lot to her.

I thought that I fell in love… maybe. No! I am sure I am in love now. I've realized that the night before while thinking over my life while watching the full moon up in the sky.

I was in love! That was indisputable… but something wasn't allowing me to admit it loud and confess to her… Three things to be more accurate…

One: my useless pride. I've kept that façade since middle school and continued on back in high school. I always pretended to be someone I wasn't. I pretended to be a strong, beautiful and perfect being that would never do something as shameful as to admit their errors.

Two: her best friend. I knew that she is really close to Eli. They were always together back in high school 'till now. They are rarely seen apart. It was as if they always followed each other. That was mostly the reason why people started thinking they are a couple… and I don't know if that rumor is true or false.

Three: my fear. I am scared. I am a coward and the idea of her laughing at my face is scaring me… that or the thought of being rejected. If the rumor about Eli and her is true, it would only serve to rain more shame over me even more.

"Nicocchi…" that voice was comforting. I wanted its owner to be mine and mine alone.

"This isn't fair!" I said in a low voice.

"What isn't fair?"

My eyes widened as I recognized that voice. The person I was thinking about was indeed standing in front of me. "N-Nozomi… since when were you here?"

She just displayed a sly smile. "Just few minutes after your Mother left. I was already on my way to see you when I met her at the building's entrance."

I could feel my face becoming hot. I wanted to yell something, but gave up soon on that thought. I just looked down at my hands that were fidgeting with the pajama pant. "I… I am… happy you came…" I said in a really low voice. I was embarrassed to death for telling that last sentence.

"Oh, Nicocchi." She said and second later, I was wrapped between her arms and soon found my face buried between her breasts. "That sentence; that's so kind of you!"

I thought that I would suffocate… but somehow deep inside, I kind of liked it a little. "Hey, let go of me, boob demon!"

My complain fell on deaf ears as the hug tightened. I soon felt something wet falling down on my head. It wasn't sweat. It was most likely… tears. Tears? _'What? Is she crying?'_

There a long silence as none of us decided to speak for a while. After a good minute, I started to hear the sound of sobbing.

"Nicocchi…"

"Nozomi…" I said in a low voice. I was unsure of what to do.

She finally let go of me and took place on the crouch as well. She first whipped her tears. "… I heard the entire story from your Mother…"

"I see…" I looked down at my hand and started fidgeting. What was I supposed to do at these times? "But you don't have to worry about it! I will be fine! I will smile for them until the last minute…"

There was another awkward silence. Nozomi was finally the first to speak again after few minutes. "I made a decision." I turned my head to her. "I've talked to your Mother last night and she told me about you needing a helper. She explained all the difficulties your family is facing right now, and I made up my mind." She took a deep breath. "I will be your helper!"

That statement took me by surprise. What was she saying? "A-are you and idiot? How could you just easily decide that? How about college? You still have class as I know… and how about Eli?"

"Elicchi?" she asked and stared at my eyes with her pair of emerald orbs. "What about Elicchi?"

"I mean you're going out, right? And it will be weird if you spend most of your days taking care of me." I almost yelled back.

"What are you talking about?" she had a worried expression on her face. "Elicchi and I aren't dating. The one I love is you!"

I blinked once and the twice. _'What did she just say?'_ "Wh-what do you mean by that?"

"Well… you know; loving a people is a sentiment of wanting to spend their live by the side of that person."

"I know what does love mean!" I involuntarily raised my tone. "What I asked is why you told me that? Are you mocking me once again?"

"No! I will never do such things!" she held my hand. I felt my face becoming hotter as she stared right into me. "Nicocchi… you are a strong person! You always followed your dream and gave 200% of yourself into your passion. I am someone that relies on cards and fortune in life, but you… you always fight hard to build your own destiny. That was why I started having feelings for you since high school… but I never got the chance to confess…"

I was left speechless. I just shyly averted my gaze and looked at the floor. I knew that my face was red. "O-of course everyone would fall for the great Nico-Nii!" I tried to joke, but I wasn't in the mood myself and then sighed. "I… I will only say it once, so listen well in that case…"

She was first surprised by my reaction, but soon relaxed and smiled. "So, what is that so important thing you want to tell me yan~"

I leaned closer until my lips were only few centimeters away from her left ear. I could see her usually calm and stoic face turning red. I slowly whispered 4 words into her ear. "I love you too!"

I pulled back after saying that sentence and tried to look everywhere but at her. There was another awkward silence as the two of us were just blushing like shy high school girls in the living room.

That silence continued on for few seconds until Nozomi finally let go of some giggles. I lifted my head and glared at her. "What's so funny?"

"I'm just happy you are so honest!" she stopped giggling and her usually mischievous expression turned into a heartwarming and gentle smile. "I love you, Nicocchi! Please go out with me!"

My face became even hotter that earlier. One thing was sure; I must have been blushing like crazy, to the point that my face would be redder than Maki's hair. I yelped and almost bit my tongue. "W-what are you talking about? You shall not ask to monopolize Nico. After all, Nico-Nii is for everyone…." I soon regretted saying these words and started looking down at my hand once again. "I'm sorry! That wasn't what I wanted to say…"

I bit my lips. How should I tell her? I didn't want to see her suffer… I wanted to spent more time with her and I wanted us to hold hand in public… deep inside, that was what I wanted… but I knew that we couldn't have a future together. I was doomed and was going to die really soon, and I didn't want to burden her.

"I… I have to decline your offer…" I said in a low tone.

"But why?" she asked while grabbing her hand. "Is it because I did lot of bad things to you in the past? If it's the case, I apologize for them and I ask for you to give me a chance to pay back and repair all these fault…" her voice broke and her eyes watered.

I could feel tears forming in my eyes as well. "You're totally missing the point!" I said in my own broken voice. "Why haven't you realized it yet?" I yelled. "I love you and I want to be with you… but I am going to die soon! We can't have a future together. I only have three months left… and I don't want to inflict you the burden when I will have to go as well."

"I know that!" she yelled back. "I know that you don't have that much time left! That's why I want to spend these times by your side until the last second. I am a coward, Nicocchi… that was why I always fled in the past… but now, I want to stay until the end. I want to spend each day by your side until you will depart to the other world. I want to enjoy our every touch. I want to be able to take care of you and I want to see you everyday… even if there's only three months left."

More tears ran on our cheeks as our face came closer. "Y-you idiot! I want to be by your side as well, but…"

"You're the idiot one!" she pushed me on the couch and crawled over my petite body. "There is no but! I regret not confessing earlier… and I want to profit of the remaining time we have together to the maximum."

My feelings were totally mixed at that moment. I felt sad, but somehow happy… and more than everything, I wanted to be by her side as much as she wanted. "I… I want to be by your side as well!"

She whipped my tears with her thumb. I stared at her and did the same. She smiled.

"F-fine!" I was determined. I will enjoy our remaining time until the end and I will have no regret! "I accept your offer in that case…"

"Nicocchi…" her eyes softened. "… Thank you! I promise to do all in my power until the last day."

She leaned closer and closed her eyes. Our faces were only few centimeter away from each other as she leaned in slower. I finally decided to make one big step toward the world of honesty and grabbed her by the waist and initiated the kiss… my first kiss… her first kiss… our first kiss…

I closed my eyes as well and we both enjoyed the feeling of sharing warmth from each other's mouth. It was a gentle kiss. It was enough for us at that time.

We finally separated after few seconds, but for us, it felt like an eternity. We shyly smiled at each other.

"Thank you, Nozomi!"

She laid by my side on the crouch and wrapped her arms around my small body. I was surprised at first, but quickly smiled, turned to her and wrapped my tinny arms around her neck. We engaged in another kiss and closed our eyes.

' _I am happy! I am so happy to love someone and be loved back!'_

…

' _I don't know how this will end… but I will do my best to return her feeling as the best as I could.'_

…

' _Nozomi… I love you! Thank you for always staying by my side!'_

 **[To be continued]**

 **That's it! Once again, sorry for the really late update!**

 **By the way, there is a kind of sequel to this story, its title is "Another chance" and it's a Crossover with the anime Angel Beats.**

 **I will still try to update this as soon as I could, but I can't promise of a date. Just stay tuned and as always, have a nice day!**

 **Also, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!**


	3. Chapter 3: The two of us

_So hot..._

I looked up at the blue summer sky, seated on a park bench, a cone of ice cream in hand. The doctor has said I was free to eat whatever I wanted. No food restriction. Nozomi has taken full pleasure of that and has decided to spoil me like never.

Talking about her, my girlfriend...

'Waaa...' I screamed mentally, face turning red and eyes looking down at my pair of cute pink sandals. 'It's so embarrassing!'

I was not used to everything yet. Nozomi has just confessed that she loved me few hours prior and now the two of us were on a date on the park.

Everything went well... At least, that was what I thought.

Talking about the fortuneteller, she was at the pharmacy to buy something. She just excused herself few minutes prior and wasn't back yet.

A feeling of loneliness was born on my chest as I slowly moved my hand to hold it. It was hard to admit and I didn't want to admit it but I felt lonely when Nozomi wasn't there. I might be selfish by always wanting her to be by my side but... I was dying...

'Yet... Why do I feel this guilty...?'

"Sorry for making you wait!" A very familiar voice brought me to reality and a smile quickly appeared on my face. However, I couldn't show her that I was happy she was back. I still have my pride after all.

Hiding the smile with a scowling voice and face, I turned to her. "Took you long enough! Your boobs are making you slower and slower each time. Do a diet, woman!"

Nozomi just chuckled as she sat down on the bench by my right before linking arms with me, that smile never leaving her face. "Ya were lonely without me yan~" She said in a teasing voice, making me want to push her away. Before I could have done anything though, the fortuneteller has decided to lean against my petite body and rested her head on my shoulder. My face turned red as she started to slowly purr. "Nikocchi... So comfortable..."

"Jeez! Nozomi!" I said in an embarrassed tone. True enough, the park wasn't that populated but it was still embarrassing. The great idol Niko-Nii couldn't afford to be seen in such scandalitical situation.

'Great idol Niko-Nii?' I chuckle while thinking and remembering about that. I was just a stupid idiot. To think that I wasted about 10 years of my life having a stupid dream that was never going to get true.

"Hun... Nikocchi?"

I was brought back out of my thought by Nozomi's voice and turned in her direction to meet up with a pair of emerald eyes. Concern could be seen in them, making me feel guilty. I didn't like to see her sad or upset.

Forcing a smile and adding my signature pose in addition as to cheer up, I also decided to use my usual cheerful tone. "Niko Niko your heart~"

Now that I think about it, it pained me to play such hypocrite. Nozomi was sacrificing everything else to be with me, being my helper and on the other hand... I am lying to her.

My smile slowly dropped and so did my hands until they were rested on my lap. I looked down, unable to make eye contact with the girlfriend of mine who was seated on my right.

"Nikocchi...?"

I didn't say anything...

There was a moment of silence as I was just looking down while Nozomi was looking at me. I felt even guiltier. 'Nozomi is such good person... She doesn't deserve to suffer because of someone like me...'

"You know..." She closed her eyes and stood up before kneeling in front of me. I still tried to avoid eye contact but felt that she was giving me another one of her warm smile. "I love the energetic Nikocchi!"

Her sentence took my curiosity as I slightly lifted my head and as expected met up with a pair of shining eyes and a dazzling smile.

"I love the Nikocchi who always smile no matter what. I love the Nikocchi who ever gave up her dreams even if the world was against her. I love the Nikocchi who said that she was going to write her own destiny and not just lean on cards or a piece of paper." She paused an instant, leaning closer as to make our forehead meet. "I love everything about Nikocchi... The way you smile, the way you cry, the way you talk about the people you love and how you show your affection toward your friends." She moved her hands and took me in a warm embrace.

I felt so happy that tears formed on my eyes. Nozomi was like my angel. She could be very harsh and pervert most of the time but she was always willing to help anyone. She has even helped someone as stupid as me to become a better person. I knew it; she was a league above. I couldn't admit that loud though.

She as always forceful but is very considerate and think about my future more than I do myself. When anything has happened to me, Nozomi always found a way to understand me and be there, like after assisting Rin's funeral. She was there for me, holding my hand until I calmed down. Same with when Honoka died.

'I so hate her! Why is she so perfect in my eyes? I hate that!' I screamed mentally, lost. Maybe it was because of the illness or something else. I just felt like life was too unfair. I wanted to spend more times with Mom, Kokoro, Kokoa, Kotaro and Nozomi... yet... Why me?

"Nikocchi..."

I slowly turned back to Nozomi as she said my name. Tears were running her cheeks, a bittersweet smile on her lips. It broke my heart to see this.

She moved her left hand and whipped my tears with her fingers. "You are beautiful! Just be yourself and no one else. I will always love you!"

I felt my breathing stop for a couple of second as I was taken by surprise. With the sun settling at the horizon and these diamond tears running on Nozomi's cheek, I felt more sadness building on my chest. However, that was not all. A vortex of feeling was taking over my body; sadness, hatred, happiness, despair, love... It was as if I have awakened after months in a slumber.

True enough, losing both my best friends Rin and Honoka has affected me a lot. I admit it now. I never wanted to let that affect me though, always giving my best, following my dreams for the three of us. I put my own feelings aside and lifted my eyes high, aiming for something higher when I still had lot of things near me.

Nozomi understood how I really felt and I was glad she said these words to me. I was lying to myself and she has helped me realize how stupid I was.

"Nozomi..." Letting go of several sobs, more tears formed on my eyes, making my vision turn blurry. My arms unconsciously moved on their own as to take my girlfriend in a hug. "Thank you!" I muttered in between sobs while bringing her closer and hid my face in her cleavage.

She started to pat my head and drew circles on my back. "I love you, Nikocchi!" She said, making me to cry even more, letting go of these feelings I was locking deep in my soul for months now. It felt so good.

The deserted park was filled with my sobs. I was so thankful no one was around. It helped me calming down; in this empty park, just the two of us.

[-x-x-x-]

"Say, Nikocchi…"

I lifted my head as to see the serene look on Nowomi's face. She had her eyes closed and was holding me tightly while I was sitting on her lap. Both of us has thankfully calmed down after I was done evacuating all the stress accumulated since Rin's funeral.

It was already dark but the lights around the park were on so it was fine. The surrounding was very calm. I couldn't help but to dig my face in her chest, a small blush appearing on my cheeks. "What is it, idiot?"

A pair of chuckle escaped her lips and I readied myself to get teased again. However, it never happened but instead, she leaned closer and moved her hands to grope my bottom.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" I asked in a not-so-angry tone. Sure, it annoyed me…but I was too happy to get angry toward her. I was thankful Nozomi has been staying by my side all these years. _Who knows? Maybe if we had a future together, we would make a great couple._

Thinking about that made me look down but my girlfriend quickly raised my head by grabbing my chin. "Nikocchi! Why are you looking down once again? My eyes are up there and my ears are all yours!" She said in a scolding tone before letting go of a giggle, that same smile appearing back on her adorable face. "I already said it and I will say it again: I am your ally! You can tell me anything. I will keep your secrets, be your accomplice in crime, be your partner for anything."

I couldn't help my lips from curling into a smile. _That damn Nozomi!_

I looked up at the dark summer sky and had a bittersweet smile. "You know… I've loved you for a while now…"

"Nikocchi…" There was surprise in her voice but I didn't mind it as I continued.

"There were times I've dreamed about how our future would be if I was more honest with myself…" I gulped. I felt sad and nostalgic but for odd reasons, I didn't feel like crying anymore. "When you hold me in your arms like this…" I adjusted my head so that my pair of ruby eyes could meet emerald ones. "I feel like I could fly. I'm so happy it's hard to express it with words." Moving my arms and reaching for my own hair, I started to stroke it, face reddening and so was Nozomi's. "You can see everything through my façade… You truly are amazing… To be honest, all that is making me want to be more honest and to stop lying to the others and to myself." Holding the pair of bow holding my hair in twintails, I removed them, allowing my hair out of their binding spot and fall down on my back. "Nozomi… Please see the true me!"

The fortuneteller's face was beet red by that time as I untied her hair as well and re-attached in back in low twintails with the bows I was using earlier. She looked good with them; a mix of childish and mature, a mix of dark and bright, a mix of long and short, a mix of big and small, a mix of minus and plus.

"Nikocchi…"

It took her a couple of second but Nozomi finally calmed down and returned to smile, running her fingers on my hair. I was just busy looking at her with dim yet sensual eyes. She was beautiful, kind, reliable and all I can't list.

"Are you not feeling well?" Her words caught my attention once again and I made a tilt of the head. "Your face is all red, you are looking at me as if you wanted to lie me in a bed and you have been telling lot of embarrassing things since earlier." Her cheeks were red as she was trying to avoid eye contact. I couldn't help but to chuckle, thinking that the arrogant and confident Nozomi would turn into this girl in front of me because of these words.

I lifted her head and placed my forehead against hers, closing my eyes. "I am serious, Nozomi! I am tired of lying. I want you to be there by my side, to help me walk forward, to allow me help my family. You are the person I trust the most." I said in a serious voice. I still had few doubts with myself but at least, I was sure of something: I can trust Nozomi more than anyone else. "And when I will be gone, I want you to find happiness."

I felt the grip on my pajama blouse tightening at my last sentence followed by a sob from the fortuneteller. Pain was written all over her face. She was trying to look strong by always avoiding the discussion but was fast to break down as I evoked it. However, we both knew my death was unavoidable.

Tears ran on her cheeks, followed by more steps. "Nikocchi… I don't want to lose you! Please don't go! Please don't leave my side anymore!" Her voice broke out and her tone increased, showing her sadness, revealing what she has attempted to hide all that time.

I moved my hands and drew circles on her back. I was still seated on her lap so it was not hard to do so. With another move, I tightened the embrace and stroke her hair with my right hand as the left one was still on her back. _'So, this is how Honoka felt back then…?'_ For me, it was already checkmate. No matter what I do, I will be dead, leaving behind sad people. All I could do was to help them by doing my best until 'that day'. I need to show them that no matter what happens, they will have to move forward. I want them to still smile and find happiness, no matter what. "Nozomi… You crybaby!"

She continued to sob and I held her closer. I will stay by her side until she is ready. I promised that to myself.

"But I can't help it!" Nozomi countered, her face against my (flat) chest. Her tears were making my pajama top wet but it didn't matter. Clothes can be washed but comforting her was the most important thing. "When I think about the possibility of living without you, I feel very sad and upset and lose my will to live."

"Tsss." I smiled before putting a small distance between us as to allow me to have a look at her face soaked in her own tears. Looking at her being this miserable was making my chest to tighten but instead, I never dropped my smile. It was time for Niko-Nii to shine. "You truly are an idiot!" I moved my left hand and gave a small pinch to her cheeks. "Of course, you will feel sad. After all, the great idol Niko-Nii will be gone and you will feel lonely." I forced these words out as if it was a joke. However, I felt like saying these was imperative and it would heal more than it hurts. I was starting to understand how dying people are feeling; the fact of wanting their beloved ones to always live on and find happiness even when they are gone. "But remember: life is made of two things; sadness and happiness. As long as something sad might happen, there will always be happy ones. I, Niko, will always look on you. You are very important to me. And so are Mom, Kokoro, Kokoa, Kotaro, everyone from µ's, the A-RISEs, Arisa-chan, Yukiho-chan and everyone who has supported us all back then. It's because I love you all so much that I want you to live on and continue to spread smiles no matter what."

"Nikocchi…"

I cupped her cheeks with both hands and pierced her eyes with mine. I felt like I could access her soul right away if I really wanted. "My name is Niko, meaning smile! Mom and Dad have chosen to name me like that because they wanted me to be the heart, the one that always smile and bring happiness to the people around me." There was a brief moment of pause before I spoke again. "With the remaining time I have left, I want to smile to the fullest and cheer as much people as I could. After that, I would like you to also resume that path."

Leaning closer, I pressed my lips against hers for a couple of second before leaning back and gave another smile. With the full moon above us as the only spectator and witness to everything, Nozomi's tears has stopped as she was just looking at me with that look, that sad look, sobs still escaping her lips.

"Your name is Nozomi. It means wish. Thanks to you, my wish to become a better person is possible. My second wish is for you all to still continue forward despite everything. And that second wish…" I moved my right hand and caressed her cheeks, whipping the remaining tears. "Only you will be able to grant that." Leaning another time, I kissed her cheek now clean of tears as her lips formed a pout. "You will continue to smile and be yourself. I know you can do that."

"Niko… I…"

A chuckle escaped my lips. "It's the first time you didn't call me by my nickname. It makes me so happy."

"You are not yourself today…"

"Whose fault is it?"

That last question has allowed me to earn a small smile from her.

"I know! Let's make a promise!"

"A promise?" She asked in a surprised voice.

I just smiled while moving my right hand and placed it in front of her. "A double-deal promise! You promise that you will always do your best even if I am not here anymore and I promise that I will always stay by your side until that day."

Nozomi hesitated. Truth be told, if I was on her place, I would be having the same reaction. However, I was not in that situation. In fact, I was in a different caliber, to the point of now understanding lot of new things that I never thought about while still healthy. I could understand how Honoka felt… However, I will walk my own path. I will by Nozomi's wife until I will have to go. I will enjoy every second I have to live and do whatever I could to make everyone smile.

 _Niko!_

The fortuneteller finally smiled and also moved her right hand as to make a pinky promise. "I promise!" She said with a sincere tone. "However, I want us to get married ASAP! Like right away!"

I let go of another giggle before reaching for my cellphone. "You truly are a spoiled child!"

[-x-x-x-]

My heart was beating 1000 an hour and so was Nozomi's as well. We were going to get married. Truth, it was not one of these fancy weddings and we were not going to get to the tribunal and all the papers. I have just called few important people and gathered them at our apartment for the event.

Even Kotori, Maki and Hanayo who were still mourning did come and wore normal clothes instead of the black ones. Everyone we cared about and care about us was there. Surprise, they were all available that night. Nozomi is so lucky sometimes I wonder if she didn't make a pact with an angel…or a demon.

With Miss Minami playing the priest, Kokoro and Kokoa being the sacred maidens, it was just a funny and simple wedding… but it has allowed me to see my girlfriend, soon-to-be-wife to smile again. Talking about her, she was being dressed up by her best friend Eri, her sister Arisa and Yukiho. On my side, Mom was whipping her tears with a tissue while Anju and Tsubasa were choosing my dress.

"Our daughter is a woman! I am very proud of you." Mom said as she whipped another tear. "I'm so glad you found your way, be who you are without being embarrassed about it. I am sure Nozomi and you are perfect for each others." She smiled and walked at her left before grabbing a picture. "I am sure that your father would be proud as well."

I returned the smile. "Yes!"

The rest went on without that much incident. With lot of happy tears and cheers, we somehow managed to avoid getting noises complain from the neighbors. With the ceremony over, I was still blushing like a little girl at the memory of Nozomi shamelessly kissing me in front of everyone. Umi has passed out and Hanayo had to take care of her.

I could say it was a great day. On the same day, I got confessed to, started dating the girl I have loved since high school, admitted my true feelings and got married to the woman of my dreams. A little rushed you might complain? Well… I don't care!

I know that this happiness will have to end someday… but I want to enjoy every second I could. There are no places for tears or regrets for now. Only smiles are awaiting for us.

[-x-x-x-]

 **A/N: Hey! That was a while since I last did anything. Reason: our computer broke and I'm also too broke to buy a new one. Also, holiday her started two weeks ago and a friend lent me his laptop to allow me do some updates.**

 **Anyway, I hope this short chapter brought tears and smile to everyone and see you all very soon :)**

" **Niko is life! Niko is love!"**


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